orangelyn's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- come play with me bitch.. i'm no toy i can be bothered no more. crisis is wat i'm going through a dilemma. i dun wanna torture myself no more. it's so hurting and tiring. to face it everyday to try to please everyone. it's no point putting in effort like trying to fill a bucket with no base i tried. i did. the result: disappointment. i feel no hate. just anger and sadness. it's so close to me giving up. the lost efforts made. useless. at last, i'm tired. truely. understanding is beyond my control it's true that maturity doesn't cum with age. i'm confused. angered. saddened. i dun horde u with my troubles. you'll never know what i'm feeling now. it's emptiness + numbness. pain is increasing. i've tried to control. to be nice. well... but i'm human too. i have my emotions to show. i can't be keeping it inside me. when i blast, there will be hell to pay. and so far i have not. tried to reason to myself. to control and surpress that urge inside of me. i've problems too. both outside and inside school. do u understand? never. have u thought bout it? no. would u? i doubt so. i'm sorry to all my peeps who have gone trough the hard and good times with me. for all the problems that will arise from this shit. sorry. i am. i pray for ur forgiveness. i didn't mean it for it to end this way. i tried. it failed. sorry to screw our last year in skool up. sorry for everything. thank you for being there for me and for giving the happy times that i'll never forget. thank you. i know it hurts for u people to go through all these stuff. u all dun deserve tis. yet, i'm putting u through all this. it most sinful sorry 2004. 6:23 p.m. - 2004-02-24 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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